Superman has Lex Luthor, Batman has the Joker...and Marshmarathon has the dreaded Aunt Flo. Having dealt with her for a number of years, I know how she operates and can almost predict her entrance, but it doesn't make it that much easier.
As with any arch nemesis, Aunt Flo usually sends some of her henchmen ahead of her to stir up trouble and weaken her foe before she attacks:
Bloatrix - has mighty powers of fluid shifting and retention and can slow things down to a measly crawl. She also has the power to split seams, pop buttons and cause sausage fingers.
Dirty, filthy, lying scale - has the powerful ability to change the gravitational pull of the Earth only when you step on a scale.
Gobble-lins - affect appetite centers of the brain, especially the chocolate gland in the cerebellum causing food cravings of massive proportions.
The Emotionator - perhaps the most evil of all the henchmen with the ability to swing moods so fast, it makes grown men cry.
I think all four were working on me today. I was so apathetic about going for a run this morning, that I stopped at 2 miles. My pace was crap, my "runs" were crap and my calves had no energy to push off. I was even talking smack to Ullrey on the Week 4 podcast. He would pipe in with "this next run is only 5 minutes, you can do it" to which I retorted "screw off!" After 5 minutes he would say "Great job! Now walk for another 90 seconds and we'll follow it up with a 3 minute run". "The hell you say" I spat...then tried to do it anyway. Sometimes a little verbal defiance helps with physical obedience. Ullrey to me is like Alfred to Batman. I don't always heed his wisdom.
Feeling a bit deflated, I went and bought groceries and an apple fritter (nom nom). Feeling guilty about the apple fritter, I decided to give it another 2 miles around the neighborhood to work off the donut. The first mile was great and the second mile was crap again. Oh well. Tomorrow will be a rest day (if you consider working a 12 hour shift a day of rest)
Power song of the day: "I Ran" by Flock of Seagulls
1 comment:
Love it. Your entries are amusing as hell. ;)
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